Wah was reading kennysia and xiaxue's blog. Then looknig back at my blog, its pathetic i tell yah..... Can't believe how low standard my blog is. Always full of lousy whims and complaints..... LOL.... So irritating.... Maybe i should write about things that pop in my head and not just whining and complaining about stupid "Love", relationships etc yadda yadda.. Talk about the stupid on goings in my life.....
By now some will go wait a min, Carey so free one meh?? Can actually read people's blog?!?!? Actually, its not that i don't have work but more of I have work but my boss isn't around..... Mischievious grin.... LOL.. Can't believe how naughty and unethical I am. Using company time to blog and read other people's blog... UNBELIEVABLE.. Tsk tsk tsk... Should rot in hell for this... Hmm I think i shall take more photos and include more stuff... That's what this blog is lacking PHOTOS ARH.... MORE MORE MMMMOOOOORRREEEEE PHOTOS!!!!! That's the WAY to GO! LOL...... Shiok I tell yah....
Anyway, I think i kinda have a bad impression in my sub superior's mind... But that's my intuition or rather lousy sixth sense... Lol... Always thought i would wanna work in this company initially but I think I'm gonna aim for the sky high... One day i hope to be in the CEO seat... Though that's a distant dream but hopefully I can... And not be just a low level white collar staff that sits in a small little cubicle and waits for things to happen. Sigh... I really how these CEO's rise up to their positions? Wanna read such books about how people play company politics to their favour and rise up the coporate ladder. Darn..... That's would be a godsend man... Kekeke... I know my birthday present liaoz Allan get me such a book that talks about company politics and rising up the stupid corporate ladder!!!! Then again I keep thinking about crumpler and mp3 player... Realise such stuff are material... Then again I have never asked for anything materialistic apart from my PS2 which was my birthday present from my parents. After that its all been hongbaos... LOL.... Wonder why i do not want materialistic stuff for birthdays. I love cards though... Very happy everytime i receive one!!! Shit i just realise there goes my mouth blabbering non stop... Enough bore and gore.... Time to head back to work or perhaps lunch :-P LOL Lunch sounds better!!!!

Am writing this entry because I am desperately trying to keep myself awake at work here despite being half an hour early...... The drinking lots of water method isn't working very well because I haven't felt the effects of drinking too much water yet..... BAH!!!!!!! Went for a short walk around the office... Doesn't work much makes me even more sleepy.... YAWNZZZZZ... Now i know the importance of not coming to work early.... No choice, have to eat fisherman's friend liaoz.... Works wonders I tell u.....

Well, back to the normal bitching routine, I can't believe I've pissed two gals of in the same day... Don't know what i did also, maybe not replying emails are a no no huh.... LOL not say like i don't wanna reply your emails but its more of like I never knew i must reply to such emails or I haven't got the chance to do so..... Oh well... Somehow I just think I'm gay or some shit..... Don't understand how come I can relate to guys better than girls..... Quite pissing if you think about it actually.... Am I doomed to remain GAY everyday LOL..... Ok ok... quit day dreaming Carey think straight...... When it comes, it comes naturally.... No PUN intended LOL.... Shit hope no one ever got that... LOL

Ok a little aftermath of my birthday..... It kinda felt hmmm..... great and a little disappointing that some people i expected to remember my birthday didn't remember my birthday... LOL.... But then again guess they ain't that close to me afterall.....
No regrets man afterall I did remember most of their birthdays, drop msges and stuff..... Guess I ain't that impt to them after all huh.. Ok enough about that, I was really happy that my close pals wished me especially those living overseas..... Oi come back soon lah.... Then we can hang out together just like old days!!! Hmmm..... Birthdays are getting a little old for me, I guess my definition of birthdays is a gathering for good friends to have fun together....
This is a random entry so if you can't bear the nonsense lol don't read any further....... Then again, I've come to the end of the entry.... LOL... Carey's done it again.... Don't you feel like butchering him LOL!!!!

Happy Belated Birthday to ME!!!!

Though its another birthday, this year felt slightly different...... Rather it was really well spent time for me..... As usual my closest friends remembered my birthday, it really meant a lot to me.... After 7 years of friendship yet our bond remains so close. The thought of it really brings a tear or two to my eyes. Such truthful, well-treasured friendship. Where else can i find such friendship?? After so many years, the bonds remain in fact even stronger than before.

Ok enough sappy stuff.... What's more important is that this happy day in my life was spent with my best friends!! The night before I drove weining, lester, bobbs, jane and weiyi in my company van to Siglap's Cafe Cartel to have a chill out cum good meal. It was really great having everyone in one roof (the van's roof mind you...) talking and doing stupid stuff together!!! Really!!! It was really the good ole days where we would just hang out and somewhere near school and talk rubbish.....

On with the actual day itself, the morning was kinda wasted coz i woke up late and thus wasted morning. I returned the company van followed by dinner with my dad and Jimmy...... HongKong Street Kitchen... I have like been there four times this month... Crap must control man... If not i'll burn a hole in my pocket in no time. After lunch, met up with Weining and Lester for pool. I'm really not that good in pool but hey its the company that made it worth while. Then came Brigittee whom i'm wondering whether will she become part of this big family of ours hehehehe...... That one gotta ask weining, I'm pretty clueless about this one... *Sniggers* Played a game of pool with her which ended up I got my ass whooped.... Then we proceeded to weining's house for a game of mahjong. Can't say much about mahjong seriously afterall my titles are really getting from bad to worst in mahjong... They get shitty to more shitty HAHAHAHAH.... Looks like I cannot play mahjong for years to come man... Unless I got money if not no mahjong.....

Weiyi dropped by after work to join us. We were kinda pretty clueless where to have dinner which was actually the highlight of the day. After some decision making, we headed for this place in Liang's Court which was near Clarke Quay. It was really very FREAKIN good. The food was good and company was good. Though it was only lester, weiyi and me, it felt really good. A good meal with good friends. What more could I have asked for. Weining didn't join us coz he was sick and his mothe rmade him food.... But hey he more than made up for it by accompanying me for half the day. Although it seemed like a birthday celebration, I decided to hold the actual one when Allan gets back. ALLAN if you're reading this, yes you're GUILTY of making me wait for my presents if i actually get any.... LOL :-) The main reason being that he's coming back soon and most likely everyone will be free then. Coz no one can make it for these two weeks... Bloody hell....... LOL...... For those who won't be back in time no worries, you well wishes are already very much appreciated!!!

The only lament i have is that i didn't take enough photos or any photos on my birthday to remember it. Shall remember to take it durign the "actual" celebration bwahhahahaha......... Trigger happy to take photos!!! Memories of my life man... That marks the end of my birthday day.... 26th may....

Kids nowadays act like ah beng even on mrt also like ah beng...... Shall write about this soon.

I'm rotting in my chair doing nothing at work.... Shall reading some corp comms stuff later. Lol finally a day of rest after like three straight days of like non stop working. Feels kinda bad but hey I already asked my bosses if they had anything for me but they said no so HECK! Lol.....

The reason I felt like writing this entry is due to the fact that I've seen the light I think. I realised that I've been a fool. Why go for someone just because you just wanna her to be your gf? Is the goal that important? Why always have the goal in sight? The feeling of having someone by your side is indeed tempting but I still have my friends. Indeed, if you look beyond just relationships it feels so much better. So much happier. Life feels so much brighter when you realise there's no point in rushing into something and end up getting hurt twice as bad. Although i don't get why people can get attached in freakin one month.... Some mysteries are better left unsolved. Although its difficult but its really better to get past this stage of looking beyond the relationship, but I'm taking a first step to doing so. If anyone hears me say I like this girl, please slap me if I have known her for only like a few weeks and I say we don't know each other quite well. Well i think you guys get the idea.... Give me wake up call.... Think deep not shallow.

My buds.... Councilors like Allan, Louis, Xianna, Weiyi, Lester, Weining you guys really showed me what friends are really for. Although at times I really get very pissed with you guys for poking fun of me and stuff, but I know you guys don't mean it. Life's been a wonderful and enriching journey with you guys. Thank you. Life goes on forth, Carey feels reborn.

The Da Vinci code looks good.... Can't wait to watch it. But however i do realise that its all really very hyped up about Dan Brown's books. I mean he isn't the first person to actually come up with such stories where fact and fiction are closely intertwined together. Therefore I have come up with this theory that people try to come up with explanations for people who actually do well or in fact for anything that happens.
I do admit to a certain extent things happen because of those reasons. But one thing i feel is the fact that things happen because its just the natural cycle of life where things just happen. Nothing more, nothing less. Come on you say that Da Vinci code is a good book because of blah blah blah blah...... Isn't it just because its the fact that the author writes with pretty good english with a captivating plot and exciting storyline thats all? A lucky break that was needed for him to shoot to fame? I'm not being a sour grape or anything but things are just the way it is. Not because of the 101 theories which people come up with.

I'm pretty amazed with myself. How many times the same thing has happened but yet I am able to portray my depression, dismay, emotions and what ever shit you call it in as many wonderful ways as possible. Indeed, creativity just flows when you write huh...

I just don't feel like working now so might as well try to get this out of my system. Apparently, the heartache is as bad as the first time it happened. Why i ask myself? I have no answer. It didn't feel that bad after the first one. But this time it hurts so bad. My heart feels so heavy. Oh well still have to put on a happy face in front of everyone. Wonder how people do this man. Smile smile smile but it feels like SHIT inside? Don't they ever let it out?? Coz I know if i don't I'll go CRAZY..... Any thoughts on this anyone? Sitting here in my seat i feel like i'm treating things more maturely but inside it just feels HORRIBLE.

How I wished that at times like this there's someone i could have a shoulder to lie on and sayang. I'm sure everyone does. The road is long and winding ahead. I miss the councilors so much...... Still can remember everytime I felt like this at least one of them would be their for me.... But now they are all spread like seeds over the world. Even the ones here with me are busy with their own problems. I just wished I wasn't born to care for people but someone who is more bastardish........

Feelin a little affect at work now.... Hmm... I knew things would turn out like dat.... Once again, Carey has not failed to prove punters correct. Either he sucks in relationships or he is jinxed or both.... If you guys thought otherwise, sorry to disappoint you guys AGAIN....

Interview with my good side:
Let's look on the bright side, there's always a chance you will succeed. I mean come on you don't know what she thinks of you.. That is if you're thick skinned enough. Moreover, things aren't that bad afterall you guys are still friends rite? Life goes on, eventually you'll find someone you like so why rush or hurry into things rite?

Interview with my bad side:
Lies lah... Everything is a lie. This life is a lie. Deep down inside you know you screwed it all up AGAIN.... Come on you know its the truth. Just resign yourself to your fate.

Ok reading that you guys think i'm schizophrenic but everyone is in that sense dont you think. Everyone knows the good and the bad just how do they react to it. Seriously i just felt like someone knocked a hole through my heart or sank it into quicksand..... It just feels so heavy. Did really feel like crying for a minute just now but I'm at work. Who am i to mix my work and emotions together? No one. I'm just so tired of this shit. SHIT it.

X's Good Friend:
"But the pt is, im verys ure she doesnt noe that u feel differently about her and if u feel dat she seems to be avoiding you, there must be another reason to that.. and she has talked to me about it..
But aside from that X's some one who has very clear delinations and priorities in her life, and it's very very very unlikely that she changes her feelings towards people, be it people she dislikes or wad so ever, but more imptly her feelings towards guys are quite fixed No matter how many times i try to psycho her about someone if she doesnt feel about it, it wun work, and not possibly in the next 10 years... she's a damn tough nut to crack. So unless u really have such overwhelming feelings, patience and supernatural powers, it's going to be quite hard to move her...
Of cuz to continue to like anyone is anyone's right and choice, but if ure starting with the end in mind, which is developing a relationship, i think it's honestly going to be a very very tough road. And im saying all these because i have known X since sec1 even though we only became best friends in sec3, she's always been like that. she's damn constant and im letting u know thise cause ure one of my good friends in smu, and i dun want you to feel hurt by her or that you feel frustrated because you dun noe wad to do... "

Doesn't this feel like rejection...........
Oh well, thats where the song below comes in i guess..... What to do.... bah!

My Favourite Song at the Moment:

"Bad Day"

Where is the moment we needed the most

You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

They tell me your blue skies fade to grey

They tell me your passion's gone away

And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low

You're faking a smile with the coffee to go

You tell me your life's been way off line

You're falling to pieces everytime

And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day

You're taking one down

You sing a sad song just to turn it around

You say you don't know

You tell me don't lie

You work at a smile and you go for a ride

You had a bad day

The camera don't lie

You're coming back down and you really don't mind

You had a bad day

You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday

The point is they laugh at what you say

And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day

You're taking one down

You sing a sad song just to turn it around

You say you don't know

You tell me don't lie

You work at a smile and you go for a ride

You had a bad day

The camera don't lie

You're coming back down and you really don't mind

You had a bad day

(Oh.. Holiday..)

Sometimes the system goes on the blink

And the whole thing turns out wrong

You might not make it back and you know

That you could be well oh that strong

And I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most

Oh you and I

You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day

You're taking one down

You sing a sad song just to turn it around

You say you don't know

You tell me don't lie

You work at a smile and you go for a ride

You had a bad day

You've seen what you like

And how does it feel for one more time

You had a bad day

You had a bad day

Had a bad day

Had a bad day

Had a bad day

Had a bad day

Had a bad day

Shall blog about this since there is ten minutes left till lunch break ends. Hmm.... Was having lunch with my colleagues (not the intern batch rather with my assistant boss and people from the risk management department. Then the talk about disasters came about... Don't ask me why disasters but yeah disasters.....
Then it made me think of back in JC when there was the 9/11 incident...... The days we spent our time on something which didn't involve us but yet made us care about the world. We move at such a fast pace that now whenever something bad happens we don't stop and go oh dear. But just walk on. Where is the sympathy? The epathy of this world?? Has it died?
You may say people still talk about it and discuss about such stuff but they forget it in a few days down the road or perhaps a few months down the road. We don't really care about anything until it really affects us directly. Give an example: if you were to see a few pieces of fruit left lying on the floor and you were to slip and fall, you would be more careful in future rite? But when you see it happen to someone, you would either offer help or just walk by. Either way you would forget about the incident a few days down the road. Hmm... Isn't tat selfish? A selfish way of thinking? You only care about yourself when things happen to you it is only then do you respond.
Hmm.. another rubbish post by me... Anyway this has nothing to do with my personal life. Just felt like talking about stuff hahahah....

Since I'm waiting for my colleagues to makan might as well make use of the time to post an entry here. Don't know why I love blogging for the past 12 hours but apparently i find it an easy way to past time in the office as well as sharpen my english skills.... Apparently I have heard comments that Louis your level of English has raised a notch through your blogging.... Sources as quoted by Mr Ma Weiyi! Lol so does bloggin really help improving your writing skills. Till now I have no idea whether it does so.

After all, when you are angry you just start to write nonsensical stuff which doesn't make sense combined with absolutely lousy english and profanity. As you can already see from my previous posts, I am indeed one of the usual suspects for doing so. The other flow of logic is that when you read you tend to write and speak better. Don't know whether how much of that is true. All I know is when Carey was young, his parents FORCED him to read and read and read. But now he doesn't read anymore..... LOL talk about cultivating a reading habit. It just makes reading more distasteful thats all hahah.. Reverse psychology right??

Aiyah seriously wats all this talk about writing kan-tang buay kan-tang (potatoes not potatoes), its making me hungry lor... Now time to complain a little more, why the heck did I land up in Mapletree as an UNDERPAID intern. Super underpaid lah.... Grrr...... ButI guess everything has its perks and holes lah.... Somemore all the interns are not from my school lor... Bloody..... Only SMU student in this company meh... Cannot be lah..... Grrr... I'm really getting very hungry... Shall go look for my fellow comrades... Adios Amigos!

Its amazing to see how so many people can reply to me in like just one night.... Many thanks for your concern.... At least it brightens my day little..... If not lots, to feel that at least someone cares.... But seriously speaking it has happened to many times that I guess I've grown NUMB to this feeling.....

Oh yeah one important tip, if you know your friend is down and he is trying to avoid the topic, don't be a INSENSITIVE FUCKING BASTARD and say " WTF!" followed by a "Whateva lah" KNNBCCB if that guy was a friend I would have punched him in the face and told him to FUCK OFF...... Grrr.... it just peeves me lah... If I want to fucking be alone, let me be...... Don't WTF me understand............. Two big hairy balls lah........

I'm typing this at work since I'm early. For all those who don't know, I am currently working at MapleTree. It is a subsidary of the government linked company Temasek. PAP! PAP....... WORKERS PARTY!! WORKERS PARTY!! OOoops let that slip out somehow. Yeah I'm working as a Coporate Communications Assistant which deals with the outside dealings of the company. People here are really very friendly and nice to work with lah. Not much politics on my workfloor but perhaps politics between us and the people from the Logistics Trust side i guess. Work is pretty fun seriously speaking made a couple of friends who are also interns here. Its really very fun to hang out though the workload is kinda tough HAHAHA... Doing annual reports is no fun arh... So freakin tedious and the company's image is at stake. Hopefully I can learn something more interesting down the road like handling press or even like corporate issues... That would be cool.

Boss a.k.a. Allan thanks for your concern. When are you coming back. Then when you come back can PARTY EVERY NIGHT!!! WOOHOO!!!! An to the annoynomous person, who are you?? Identify yourself STrANGER! hahaha just kidding lah just curious who tat was lah. Ok my five cents worth is up. Gotta go back to reading newspaper for my company. I GET PAID to read the newspaper of my company ok, don't play play!

This thought occurred to me when I was in a semi awake conscious..... If all blogs on the internet occupy a certain space right? Then where are all these blogs stored. Even if there was an archive for us to store stuff would that storage space just grow out of proportion and burst?? I mean looking at the blogs nowadays, there are so many blogs with photos and stuff how to store all these stuff online.... Wanted to say store all this shit online but heck...

One day we shall find ourselves unable to blog anymore coz there would be no more space on the internet for us to surf...... Till that day comes, happy bloggin lah and take up as much space as possible people. Don't waste teh space LOL SPAM SPAM SPAM..............

Have you ever wondered or even thought about this:
Imagine the toilet door is slightly ajar. Then you peek into the cubicle to find someone covered in bloody floating in the air saying in a ghastly voice:" WHY.......... why did you do it.......... WHY...."

This is the impression i get EVERYTIME i go to my company toilet lor.... Bloody hell..... Coz all the door are slightly closed and there's normally no one in the toilet except for me only... So it really gives you the creeps especially if you think about the above scenario carefully... Lol.....

Sigh looking back at all my entries they are all so shallow no interllectual pieces of jabroni MONKEY crap....... Aiyoh.... Nothing interesting all whining and complaining.... Its like I treat this blog as a kao bei site.... Nothing interllectual so just kao bei lor... Afterall this is the only form of release I know to be effective and peaceful.... Somemore at least it lulls me to sleep.... As we speak, I'm getting sleepy on my bed liaoz..... YAWNZZZ......

Alright I know this has happened for the HUNDRED and ONE time.... But still, Carey has done it again.... scared some gal off.... Aiyoh.... why can the right one just fucking come along and I can get along just nice in life.

Must make me wait till the cows come home then can is it?? I already 22 this year leh..... So you want me to wait till I die a virgin then happy arh.... BAHH....... Wah liaoz eh.... Oh well what a way to start a blog entry ever since so long.

I also don't know wats coming over me lah. Grades suck, love life suck, I suck, SUCK COCK LAH...... Bloody man..... It just feels so sucky to always see couples from a far..... Then I'm stuck with my little bro. Best buddies i tell yah.... from young till now..... Aiyah why can't someone just love me as much as i can to anyone.... Shit I a fookin flirt arh.... wah lan eh... Not that I'm good looking or anything, if moses lim can get a wife why can't I arh..... Must be fat enough then can is it??

Last warning cupid better shoot me with a proper arrow hor...... Someone better tie me up with someone else with a red string... Abracadabra Hocus Pocus whatever whatever........ Arh @#$% lah what am I talking man... Rubbish lah.... Just ignore this rubbish post.