Sitting down having a nice cup of tea and watching time go by, thoughts really race through your mind. Hundred and one thoughts from thinking about whether someone on the other side of the world is looking at the same sky as you to what you want in life. I guess this blog really reflects a lot of things about me, my thoughts and what i really want. 

Life's always so confusing, a million thoughts race through your mind when you're in action, but you never know what to do. Instinct takes over, feelings take over. Rationale disappears. Isn't that what happens when you're blinded by something? Thats why we're human i guess.... Thats why i won't abandon you, thats why i won't abandon anything i hold dear. 

Its been awhile since I've been back.... One more year to my graduation and one more year to even more responsibility on my shoulders. Upon graduation, I'll be the sole breadwinner in the family since both my parents ain't working. Another important thing I have to think about would be my career path. Do I want to stay in the business world? Or do I want to start a career in the govt sector? Truly lots of questions to be answered.
From giving tuition for the past few years, I realised I have a knack for education work. Students under me just like to stick around with me. In fact, I enjoy teaching sometimes despite the fact that it restricts my carefree schedule. Then again, studying in SMU won't get me a good career in the education business. Somehow I have this feeling i would end up working in the business world. Starting off with a marketing position in some MNC, getting some international experience first before eventually ending up being a consultant for the big companies. The exact details i'm not too sure how to achieve it but hey i've got one year to figure out how i'm gonna get there. At least, I've kinda given it some thought to what industry I'm interested in going into and its definitely not finance but more of the marketing/communications/events side. Hopefully I get an internship in a marketing firm so that I can get a better feel of where my interests lies in. Career wise at least I know I have one year to decide and plan my future ahead. Love wise thats another story to tell another day...

I'm sitting in my room thinking about my whole trip to the UK its been fun and stupid at times. Yet its this stupid problem that constantly comes to haunt me... Who the hell is this girl i'm supposed to wait for?? Its just so weird. Been looking at the photos of my friends on facebook. And i accidentally came onto this girl whom i was so close to being attached to. Yet everything just went wrong. Another guy, time away and bang she tells me its not working out.... Sigh... Things must be really fucked up somewhere in my life man... Where oh where can that woman be.....
Been reading this book its called the black swan. Highly interesting book and i recommend ppl read it. Pretty cool book i think.

"If we see something not right, we can advise them if u truly think it's not good... but do so in the capacity of a friend and not a judge." A wise man once said. He also said,
"We try our best to be as good as we can... But we cannot succeed on our own... The worst is to think we have succeeded, that we are great and holy and decent when we actually are not..."

Thats whats friends are for. To give you the wake up call when you're in disillusion and when you're in the wrong. Remember that. Remember that....

I'm disillusioned about how some people are in my life. No morals or whatsoever. Someone just knock me dead please......

This trip to Europe really has been an eye opener for me. From the stupid mistakes that I make with my life to the invaluable lessons I have learned here. Yet so much has happened that I really have to rethink about the things in my life and how it should be from now on.
First and foremost, to be a responsible person and care about the important things in life. My family and my true friends. I realised that I've neglect certain aspects of my family and i really miss them over here. Its like i've received enlightenment about family being closest to your heart. I really love them so much and they are so important to me. I should really be more responsible and show more love and care towards my family members more from now on. Of course alongside my family, studies become a very important part of my priorities as I really want to study hard and work hard to give my parents a comfortable life.
True friends. Well those that really have stood through thick and thin with me. Councilors and some very close SMU people and a friend from Bath. I'm sure i don't have to mention who it is but as long as i know who they are its alright. Coz these friends have already accepted who I am and really appreciate me as a friend. I should really be thankful for these friends and start to appreciate them even further. Be there for them when they are down and listen to them like what true friends do.
Last but not the least, lead an honest and upright life with nothing to be ashamed about. Not doing anything that disgraces myself or my family and doing the things i feel are right. In that way, even if I die i would have nothing to hide. No lies. But having said that, I realise the need to be as sociable but as observant and equal to everyone. Even normal friends. What do I mean. Well, just draw the thin line and observe people instead of running my mouth non stop and talking nonsense with people. That really is a skill I must pick up which i feel is important to survive in this world. Having said so much, its nothing with talk and no action. Hopefully when i get back, you guys reading this would have seen a slight change in me for the better. To the better things in my life worth looking out for.

Don't know what i'm doing but i think its time for me to rethink over somethings. I'm gonna rethink over what my goal in life and whats important in life....

I don't know why but i just hate dinner or social sessions with some people over here. Maybe i really don't like socialising... Or i have the wrong intentions for socialising? Feels kinda weird though ain' it? For me to be speaking about something like this. A social holic like me saying i hate socialising... That doesn't sound very right i guess.... Oh well.,.. I'm thinking about things again the same thing that stupid mistake.... I don't know.

One mistake will remember for the rest of my life... An life long lesson i will never forget..... If only I wasn't so stupid at that point of time.... Yet life goes on but in a different perspective. This trip has been really i feel one of the most life changing trip for me. Having to learn how to tolerate people whom I don't know well to travel, learning how to take care of myself and learning certain things the hard way. It really has been hard for me especially the most stupid thing i've ever done in my life was unfolded last night. I swear nvr again this will happen to me and I will change to be more responsible and more mature. Let this entry be a proof and a reminder to myself whenever I forget...

I have no idea why i feel like reviving this dead blog from the ashes but I will anyway. Its been close to a year since i last updated this blog. Tons of things have happened from the extremely unlucky accident to my trip in Europe. Yet one thing remains unchanged though, I'm still single. Well, that doesn't really matter does it? (Self reassuring statement). Don't know why I'm so energetic anyway freaking midnight and i don't know what the heck am I doing over in Greece... Feels kinda weird. Well been blog surfing and I realised how much i missed blogging. The fun of bitching non stop about subjects and not letting anyone know about it. Well, the kid is back but not for sure though... We'll see how it goes.