I think i know what the problem is. I brought in past baggages in. Having been hurt twice before badly, I became so protective and wanting to make things work that it resulted in something turning back on me. It really made me feel really stupid and emotional.

Hopefully, its still not too late for me. Yet i know i shouldn't hope but let things happen naturally. Afterall, it takes two hands to clap. I know I haven't given the porcupine much personal space because I am keen to make it work. But to ask me to suddenly switch is something difficult to do. I need to purge the inner demons in me to move on. I'm trying I really am.

Indeed, even if it takes me a long period of time. I will change.

A funny dream about kendo that involved secondary school students and friendly shiai's

"Lying when you're caught with your pants down only makes things worst and never better.

Promises are nothing when they are empty promises.

Words hold no value when you have been caught lying or giving empty promises.

Such is the harsh cruelty of life. "